I’ve been reflecting on this question recently, partly because of two Bible passages I read in the past few weeks, and also because of other incidents that occurred during this time period.

Isaiah 57:1-2 says, “Good people pass away; the godly often die before their time. But no one seems to care or wonder why. No one seems to understand that God is protecting them from the evil to come. For those who follow godly paths will rest in peace when they die.”

In 1 Kings 14, Jeroboam’s son Abijah fell ill, so Jeroboam sent his wife to consult Prophet Ahijah and find out whether their son will survive. When Jeroboam’s wife arrived at Prophet Ahijah’s home, even though she was in disguise, Ahijah straightaway knew who she was because God already told him she was coming. Not only that, God told him what to say to her. As such, Prophet Ahijah straightaway delivered God’s message regarding Jeroboam, which was a prophecy foretelling Jeroboam’s destruction, as well as that of his family, because of Jeroboam’s sins. Then in verses 12-13 (NLT), we read something quite intriguing, “Then Ahijah said to Jeroboam’s wife, “Go on home, and when you enter the city, the child will die. All Israel will mourn for him and bury him. He is the only member of your family who will have a proper burial, for this child is the only good thing that the Lord, the God of Israel, sees in the entire family of Jeroboam.”

I find it quite intriguing that God decided that the greatest mercy for a child which He called ‘the only good thing in the house of Jeroboam’ was for that child to fall ill and die young. What can we make of that? Chances are, it goes against everything we believe should be the case. After all, someone like that child, whom God Himself called good, should receive the promise of long life (Deuteronomy 6:2, 1 Kings 3:14, Psalm 91:16). Or was this case some sort of exception?

Before going further, it is worth putting this passage into context. In those days, when someone wanted to destroy a king, they made sure they destroyed that king’s entire lineage, possibly to prevent instances of revenge somewhere down the line. As such, King’s children, having at some point enjoyed a privileged status thanks to their position, also had to suffer terribly when things went wrong, again thanks to their position. Which would have meant that a terrible death was likely going to be the case for the rest of Jeroboam’s family.

Back to the main point, in this particular instance, can we say God was in the wrong? To people observing the situation at the time, it might seem unfair that an evil man lived while a good child died. Remember though that God sees and declares the end from the beginning (Isaiah 46:10). We can ask God why He would allow such a thing, or why He determined that to be the best option for an innocent child, but we may not get the definite response that we want. Probably because such a response may be too complex for us to even understand. It would be like trying to explain complex differentiation to a toddler. For how can we fully understand God’s thought processes, not to talk of judging them?

When you think about it, is it even humanly possible to fully understand the thoughts and ways of an omniscient, omnipresent being? Where would you start from? Can you imagine the mental capacity needed to process the knowledge of every single thing existing and taking place all over the universe, bearing in mind that this knowledge changes continuously? Take one example – hair. Jesus tells us that “even the very hairs of our head are all numbered” (Matthew 10:30). On average, each person loses 50-100 hairs a day. Then consider that the world has a population of approximately 8.1 billion people. Can you imagine the kind of mind boggling calculations you would need to do to know how many hairs each person has at each point in time? By the time you finish that calculation, the number would have changed. As such, if we cannot even understand something as little as hair, then how can we presume to understand why God allows some people to die when they do?

Isaiah 40: 12-15 notes, “Who else has held the oceans in his hand? Who has measured off the heavens with his fingers? Who else knows the weight of the earth or has weighed the mountains and hills on a scale? Who is able to advise the Spirit of the LORD ? Who knows enough to give him advice or teach him? Has the LORD ever needed anyone’s advice? Does he need instruction about what is good? Did someone teach him what is right or show him the path of justice? No, for all the nations of the world are but a drop in the bucket. They are nothing more than dust on the scales. He picks up the whole earth as though it were a grain of sand.”

Romans 11:33-36 (NLT) says, “Oh, how great are God’s riches and wisdom and knowledge! How impossible it is for us to understand his decisions and his ways! For who can know the Lord’s thoughts? Who knows enough to give him advice? And who has given him so much that he needs to pay it back? For everything comes from him and exists by his power and is intended for his glory. All glory to him forever! Amen.”

We see this play out in the book of Job. God personally calls Job a righteous man, and yet he suffered greatly, losing all His children in one day, despite the fact that he was continuously praying for them (Job 1:4-7). Job understandably wants God to explain why He allowed him (Job) to suffer so much. And God basically responds to Job with a snapshot of His resume as God Almighty, the Creator of the Universe.

Incidentally, God never actually tells Job why He permitted him to suffer. People have speculated, guessed, suggested, but God Himself never gives a clear reason in the Bible. It almost feels like God is telling Job ‘you won’t understand, because you cannot grasp the scale of what I have to consider when making decisions.’ Which can be tough to accept when the pain of grief is crushing us on all sides and we really want to know why. Possibly in the hope that if there is some greater purpose, then the grief may be just that little bit easier to bear.

At the end of the day, this is where knowing God’s character and trusting Him is crucial.

In Genesis 18:25 (NLT), Abraham says to God, “Surely you wouldn’t do such a thing, destroying the righteous along with the wicked. Why, you would be treating the righteous and the wicked exactly the same! Surely you wouldn’t do that! Should not the Judge of all the earth do what is right?”

Deuteronomy 4:31 (NLT) tells us “For the LORD your God is a merciful God; he will not abandon you or destroy you or forget the solemn covenant he made with your ancestors.”

Psalm 111:4 (NKJV) states, “For He has made His wonderful works to be remembered; The LORD is gracious and full of compassion.”

2 Corinthians 1: 3-5 (ESV) says, “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For as we share abundantly in Christ’s sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too.”

These verses reveal key aspects of God’s character. God is a God of justice, mercy and compassion. Jesus, our compassionate High Priest, understands suffering, having experienced it Himself. He never leaves us alone in our moments of grief. He loves us far too much to do that. In such times, He reveals Himself to us as a God of comfort.

It is also important to point out that even if a death is a blessing, for loved ones left behind, it will still hurt. As such, it is okay to mourn, to grieve, to cry, to vent, to tell God how we feel. We see examples of the raw honesty of expressed grief detailed in some of the Psalms. We may not mourn as those who don’t have hope (1 Thessalonians 4:13), but we will still mourn. And God does not say we should not mourn. If anything, He instructs us to mourn with those who mourn (Romans 12:15b).

I pray that when faced with such situations, God will generously pour out His comfort on us, through Himself, people, places, things, through anything and everything really. For we know that it is never His desire to leave us comfortless (John 14:18).

For some of us though, it may not be the death of a person that is weighing us down, but the death of a dream, a desire, a hope we may have long held on to. Can the death of such ever be a blessing?

I cannot claim to know the answer to that, but God knows. In all cases though, we need discernment to determine whether such a death is an act of God’s mercy and consequently a blessing in disguise, or an attack from the evil one which we need to fight against. Romans 12:2 (ESV) says, “do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.” 1 Corinthians 2 illustrates that by virtue of our being true Spirit filled and Spirit led followers of Jesus, we will know and have Christ’s mind, in other words, His heart, views, feelings, wisdom. This will consequently allow us know what Christ wants us to do.

However, to become more and more like Christ, to the point where we instinctively know what His will is, we need to spend more and more time with Him. Knowing Him so intimately will inform our prayers and ensure that we are praying in line with His will, rather than in opposition to it.

Ultimately, it is comforting to “know that God works all things together for the good of those who love Him, who are called according to His purpose.” (Romans 8:28, BSB). And to remember that not even death can separate us from God’s love, as revealed through Jesus Christ (Romans 8:38-39). In Jesus, death is never the end, it is but a gateway into an even more glorious life (John 3:16, 5:24, 11:25, 14:1-3).

As such, even in the midst of our mourning, especially in the case of a child, we can draw comfort in knowing that while we may grieve all the experiences they may miss out on here on Earth – their milestone birthdays, graduations, getting married, and many other earthly life experiences, we can hold on to the knowledge that they will be having far better and more glorious experiences in Heaven with Jesus. Indeed no party on Earth can beat the one they will be having in Heaven, in the company of Jesus, the one who loves them perfectly. From His life on Earth, we know that Jesus loves to spend time with children (Matthew 19:14), and He likes a good party (Luke 7:34). And one day, we will join them in that celebration party.

I pray that as we reflect on this, we will learn to trust God even when the death of a loved one drags us into the pit of grief and despair. We may not always understand why, but as long as we trust the one who does understand, we can be at peace. May we not turn away from His love and comfort during such times, but rather fully embrace it. I pray that in such times, we will come to know God as a loving Father, a restorer, a God of comfort, who longs to hold us close and carry us through our darkest nights into a bright and glorious morning. Amen and Amen.

Image source here.

This beautiful song, ‘Behold our God‘, captures some of what I’ve written in this post, and is worth a listen.