After I’ve done some grocery shopping, while carrying my bag of groceries, sometimes my younger son likes to ‘help’ me carry the bag. The challenge though is that because he is a lot smaller than me, it feels like he is pulling the bag down, which actually makes it heavier for me to carry. So I say, “thank you for trying to help, but it’s okay, you can let go”. But sometimes he really wants to help, so he still keeps holding on.

Recently when he did this, I realised that this is what I do to Jesus. He has asked me to give him my worries and burdens, and I pray and attempt to hand them over to him, but somehow still want to carry them. Like my son, I want to ‘help’ Jesus carry my burdens, so I keep dwelling on them. However I am reminded of Matthew 11:28-29, Jesus invitation to all of us, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” (NLT). Similarly, 1 Peter 5:7 says “Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.

There is something beautiful about having someone in our lives that is not fazed by the magnitude of our problems, something reassuring when there is no danger of that person saying “This one don pass me oh”, or “this one is above my paygrade or expertise, sorry I can’t help”, something encouraging when our wahala/issues are not enough to chase that person away. And when you think about it, who but God always fits this criteria? No matter how much evil and pain and suffering there is in the world and in our lives, God’s love and faithfulness and power is greater.

Romans 8:35-39 makes this clear: “Can anything ever separate us from Christ’s love? Does it mean he no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death? As the Scriptures say, “For your sake we are killed every day; we are being slaughtered like sheep”. No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us. And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (NLT)

What a beautiful and powerful reassurance! However, despite having this assurance from God, somehow, we still often forfeit peace, and bear needless pain, because we do not carry everything to God in prayer, as the hymn ‘What a friend we have in Jesus’ notes. Either we choose to bear it on our own, or we give our problems such power that they even try to separate us from God, or we turn to other less solid substances or experiences to take away our sorrows and give us joy.

I am reminded of a board game I was playing with my kids… In the game, each character had their special powers. However, the first time we played it, we either completely forgot about the special powers that our characters possessed or just ignored it, such that even when it would have enhanced our progress or caused us to avoid negative events, we did not take advantage of the special powers but ended up suffering through those events, a completely unnecessary, pointless suffering in the game (although useful for the lesson learnt for life and this blog post!).

But on a practical level, what does letting go of our problems and holding on to God mean though? Does it mean we completely abandon our problems and pretend they don’t exist, in the hope that God will somehow make them disappear? Not necessarily. It means maintaining a consciousness that God is in control, even through the challenges we are facing, and knowing that no matter how big the challenge may be, and how insurmountable or complex it may feel to us, it cannot separate us from God… He is with us through it all. We can talk to God, because we have the gift, privilege and special power that is prayer. Through prayer, we can acknowledge the greatness of God, His omnipotence, omnipresence and omniscience, and lay down our worries at His feet. In doing this, we also get a clearer perspective of the scale and size… of God and of our problems. If we want to ‘help’ God help us, we can only do so on His terms, by asking Him for wisdom and guidance, and importantly listening and obeying Him. Otherwise, we just make things heavier and more challenging, as in the story above.

It also means we do not have to let our problems overpower or overwhelm us and rob us of our joy, but can instead make a conscious choice to learn from our experiences and potentially be a blessing to others. Kay Warren gives a beautiful definition of joy in her book ‘Choose Joy’, which I try to remember and practice. “Joy is the settled assurance that God is in control of all the details of my life, the quiet confidence that ultimately everything is going to be all right, and the determined choice to praise God in all things.” Jesus is not a stranger to suffering, so he is not like a person that claims to understand but has no clue how we feel, but as Hebrews 2:18 (NLT) puts it, “since He Himself has gone through suffering and testing, He is able to help us when we are being tested”.

Now, there are some problems that happen because, well, life in a fallen world can be like that, but there are some that, if we are honest with ourselves, we know we have caused. For the latter, does that mean there is no hope? No. The way forward could be asking for forgiveness, and wisdom from God on how to solve an issue, or if not possible, at least improving potential outcomes and drawing good out of the well of pain and mistakes. In this case, we let go of the guilt and shame, ask for forgiveness, and proactively work to solve the problems with God’s help and with the help of trusted Bible-based counsel, sometimes from wise people God has placed in our lives.

It is important that we let go of our worries, problems, guilt and shame, and hold on to God, and not the other way around… we should never mix the two up! Have you ever tried holding someone’s hand when your hand was full of rocks and stones? How did that work out?

Sometimes as humans, we try to let go of our worries but hold on to, or try alternatives. So we drop our ‘rocks and stones’ but then pick up other things – retail ‘therapy’, alcohol, social media, bingeing movies, gaming, drugs etc – looking to them for what we should look to God for. However, like every other thing that tries to be God or copy God in our lives, they are all hopelessly inadequate in the long run and fail woefully, briefly throwing us high in the air and painfully flinging us back to square one.

Can any of these things be a better friend and solution than Jesus in all seasons of life?… Love personified, faithful, truthful, merciful, generous, ever present, a solid rock, powerful. Spending time with Him worshipping, praising, reading His Word, fasting, spending time with other believers, as simple as it sounds, can be just what we need, and we won’t find ourselves being painfully flung back to square one. Even if, for our sakes, we need to go back to square one to learn, it will be with gentleness and love and with the presence of The One who loves us more than we can even fathom. Isaiah 41:13 (MSG) states “That’s right. Because I, your God, have a firm grip on you and I’m not letting go. I’m telling you, ‘Don’t panic. I’m right here to help you.”

May we remember God’s promise as we go through life with its ups and downs, and always prioritise God and His presence, maintaining a consciousness that He is always greater. It is always GOD ˃ …; never GOD ˂ …, and He has a firm grip on us. God’s grip is not a harsh grip that causes pain, but a grip that reassures of a love so divine, so pure, so powerful, and as He has promised, He will never let go. Through the waves, the storms, the calm seas, the tsunamis, remember that GOD. Will. NEVER. Let. Go.

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